It’s not friendship, it’s bromance. It’s not eyeliner, it’s guyliner. It’s not yoga, it’s broga. It’s not just silly portmanteaus, it’s evidence of the hilarious fragility of masculinity.
Rebranding is ver srs. If I don’t rebrand things that already have names with hyper masculine bullshit, someone might think I don’t care about whether or not my behavior constitutes participating within gender norms, and clearly there could not be a worse thing than not caring about perceived gender norms. I mean, it’s almost like I could lead a more relaxed and fulfilling life or something—hell, I might not even comment or even check whether or not other people are conforming to perceived gender norms, and that cannot stand.
What’s the password
Hey! Did you bring your pj’s? Pizza’s coming and mom says we can stay up as late as we want. Which Muppets movie do you want to watch first, or do you want to watch Clue or something? Mom! Cassie’s here!
Wife: No Muppets. Grease. Grease is appropriate. “I ordered pizza. We can eat pizza and watch Grease and do each others hair. Ssss.”
"It’s the eye of the tiger it’s the CREAM OF THE FIGHT"
Either a weird line or a REALLY GROSS line depending how much thought went into it.
In fourteen hundred and ninety-two
Columbus went and people slew
He was wrong about the size of Earth
Which people had known before his birth
But it landed him in a verdant place
So naturally we whitewash his case
He opened the doors for Europeans
And so he gets perpetual paeans.
Is that Topsy song from Bob’s Burgers available to download and play everywhere I go forever?
"They’ll say ,’Aww, Topsy at my auuuuutopsy…"
“boys will be bo-“
*punches you in the face*
bOYS WILL BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR ACTIONS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE
My stepmom introduced me to the sentence “boys will be boys” when I was nine, and I think I pilfered a little food from the kitchen. She is an absolutely lovely woman. I love her. However, what I thought at the moment it happened was, “Okay, I can get away with that.”
"Boys will be boys" is a terrible sentence.
Running is the worst